Today is the day for becoming something new. Tomorrow is the day for becoming something new. The day after that is the day for becoming something new. Yep, and so is the day after that.
Everyday is a great day to change into a better version of ourselves. Whether that be a healthier version of us, a more informed version of us, a more logical, a more creative, a more rested, a more productive, a quieter, a louder, a more assertive, a more meek. Yes, any day of the week is a great day for change. Yet, why does change feel so overwhelmingly scary?
What worked in the past, may not work in the future. That is okay. Actually, more than okay. Wanting to change because of that makes sense and is a valid and noble pursuit.
"Can I just show up different?" "What will everyone think?" "What if it looks like I'm trying too hard?" "My old version is not so bad." "I should stop trying to change myself and just love me for who I am."
We ask ourselves these questions, comfort ourselves with soothing statements, and flat out ignore our desires to change as valid as they are. We cannot grow like this. When we are called to change we must answer that call.
"Do I really have to?"
I mean no, not really. All of us can choose to sit here all fake comfortable i.e. uncomfortable in a version of ourselves that no longer works, of course we can, but why should we when change is really so accessible.
Yeah, change may not be easy, but it is accessible, possible. Here are three ways I learned to make change less scary and more accessible without all the overwhelm.
1. Accept the Truth
The truth about change is that change is not only inevitable, its healthy.
When we refuse change we refuse new experiences.
When we prevent ourselves from moving forward or backward or sideways we stay stagnant. Like stagnant water, stagnant people grow toxic, not healthy for anyone to take in or in certain cases for anyone to be around.
When we stay stuck in place, we shield ourselves from the movements necessary to become who we dream of being or to grow through and past what has hurt us or frightened us.
When we are unyielding, unflexible, we become rigid. Although rigid can sometimes mean strong, we cannot ignore that most times rigid can mean easier to break.
The truth is, change, although uncomfortable, is necessary for our health.
2. Adopt the Correct Mindset
The one thing that makes change easier to adapt to is having a certain mindset that makes change as simple as pouring a glass of apple juice one moment and then a glass of white grape juice the next moment. The mindset to adopt is that we are empty vessels.
While, exploring the connections between the Tao and the Bible one day I found that one major thing they had in common is the idea of being empty and able to receive from the Creator.
See when we see that we are all empty vessels, like a glass cup or a pretty vase, we can begin to understand that what we pour into ourselves or what Creator is pouring into us is a fluid, flexible, and flowing thing. This substance does not require us to fight against it, force anything into place, or to forgo on it at any time with negative worries or doubts.
Try to see what it would be like to be an empty glass cup. The cup-needer grabs you from their shelf, selects a beverage from their fridge and begins to pour.
"Sorry", glass-cup you yells, "I do not accept grape juice." "Unhand me. I only take Dr. Pepper. No lemonade and Dr. Pepper!"
No, us as glass cups do not do this. As we know, as far as glass cups work they are capable of being filled with any beverage at any time. Of course, there are special circumstances like in the case of allergies or personal preferences from the owner's, but what we all can accept easily is that class cups are capable of being filled with anything at any time.
So to, as empty vessels, are we.
We can be filled with any "beverage" with that same level of ease and decidedness as we utilize when pouring a cup of water, soda, wine, juice, whatever we desire.
We must allow ourselves to see what needs change as a fluid substance that pours into us, gets drank down, and then leaves us empty ready to be refilled with something, anything else, different.
Its that simple. No matter how big the change we are capable of receiving it. Accepting it. Allowing it to leave.
We are beyond ready to access the new and exciting changed version of ourselves right now, because we are nothing, therefore ready to be anything.
3. Apply the Plan
Get out the Pinterest app, journal, pens, and markers because it is time to make the plan real.
We often get overwhelmed when it is time to change because we cannot really see clearly how we go from point A to point B.
So, instead of staying in overwhelm we need to plan in a way that makes our change an easily acceptable reality.
This is how we do that:
A. Understand the reason why.
When we feel like a change is coming or a change is needed there is usually a reason deep down why we want to change.
Tap into that reason. Be honest with yourself.
Maybe you want to find a job that is more high paying.
Maybe you want to be in relationships that feel different more uplifting, more supportive.
Maybe it is as simple as wanting to try something new.
Only you know your reason why, so do not neglect it, find it, be proud of it, and understand it.
B. Plan with the five senses in mind.
We should ask ourselves what does "my changed self" feel like? What do we smell in our space, smell around us, or smell like physically in this changed space? What do we eat, taste, and have a taste for? What do we hear around us, what sounds do we enjoy? What do we look like and see ourselves doing?
The more details we allow ourselves access to in this planning phase the more doable our changed lives feel.
Remember if we can think it, we can believe it, if we can believe it, we can achieve it.
So, paint a vivid picture that will take away the guesswork, because less guesswork means less overwhelm and voila you're ready to change.
Today is the day for becoming something new. Then again, everyday is a great day to change into a better version of ourselves.
Changing for the better when it comes from a healthy, healed place paired with a strong reason why is always a valid and noble pursuit.
You can show up differently, today.
What people think is only a reflection of what they feel about themselves, so change anyway.
There will always be people who work harder than you and those who work less than you, so trying too hard by another's standards will always be a possibility. Choose growth. Choose change.
Do not avoid asking yourself the tough questions. Ask and change.
Do not choose soothing language that ignores your truths. Be honest and change.
Do not ignore your desires to change and for change. Grow and change.
Honestly, you don't have to change, but when everything inside you is calling for it, prolonging it is what is making you so uncomfortable. So, answer that call and change.
I am right here with you, an empty vessel, a nothing ready to be anything, a changer ready to meet those who accept the truth of change.
You are ready and I cannot wait to see what you become next.
See you next Tuesday for more!